Christmas Musings

Its almost 9:30 and the evening has wound down.  We went to the Alliance Church for their Christmas Eve service which I enjoyed.  We made quesadillas for dinner.  We teased each other good naturedly.  We each opened a present and Eryn and Tyler and Kaetlyn and Nadia left for other engagements.  I finished my last present and cleaned up the sewing room so that my sister Martha could sleep in there.  My brother Layne will be sleeping on the couch.

Its all quiet, just Christmas carols playing on the computer.  Martha is already in bed along with Rhiannon and Drew.  Layne and Dean are in the basement making music.  I just have the stocking left to do.  I am left pondering how things are the same and how things are different.  It amuses me how much pleasure it gives me how important some of our traditions are to my grown children.  Great fuss is made over when everyone can come to decorate cookies.  And I remember my own childhood and decorating sugar cookies - remember those little ball bearings that could crack your tooth and destroy fillings?  You never see those any more.... And I wonder how it will be when there is no one to decorate the tree...  Will I even do it if they aren't here to do it with me?  Children and family really are the point of Christmas for me.  I have had, until now, a steady, unbroken chain of young children and babies in my Christmases.  My daughter and my youngest sisters are the same age, after all.  Now Rhiannon is 11.  There is no one who even pretends to believe in Santa.  In fact, this year there will be no Santa gifts under the tree in the morning.  In lieu of Santa gifts we are going to Mexico as a family for Dean's 50th birthday.  We leave on January 11th so we actually be there for the day of his birthday. We are all pretty excited.  Andrew picked up his passport today so that is it.  We are a family with passports. We can cross the boarder together.  So we just got each other small gifts.  I made almost all of my gifts which isn't really different.  But this Christmas has a different feel.  A more grown up feel.  Its good different.  I know it is unlikely it will be like this forever, with all my children here around me.

I am going upstairs now to fill Andrew and Rhiannon's stockings... one of those things that hasn't changed yet.