Dream number 3, Part 4 of 6

Taken from my journal dated January 5, 2008...

"I wake up tired after another dream. This one of birth. In this dream is Carly, a 12 year old girl I know who plays cello. Although she didn't look pregnant, she was having a baby. There was no implication, in the dream, that she had had sex or that there was anything wrong with her having a baby. There was also an understanding that she would obviously not keep the baby and the baby was mine. When she realized that she was in labour, she started to freak out. But I could easily distract her by playing board games with her and she would completely forget about labour and the coming baby.

"Finally the baby was coming and it was coming too fast for the Dr to get there so I delivered the baby. It came out in 2 pushes. I was alone in the room with Carly and her parents were in another room. The baby was clearly a boy and it was very big an long - almost half the size of Carly herself (who is very tall).

"I brought her parents into the room to see the baby. The baby was growing and changing before our eyes - the blood and gunk magically disappearing.

"Then I was under a tree outside in a grassy hill, overlooking a meadow. I was sitting with Carly's mother and the baby was laying in the grass beside us. It now looked like a girl and seemed to be a girl but I remembered that it had had a penis when it was born. We were talking about how fast the baby was growing and I mentioned that it now looked like a girl. The baby had a full head of hair now and it had had a hair cut. When it opened its mouth and spoke and I saw that it had all its teeth."

I can see myself in this dream. I am Carly on the brink of birthing something and terrified of the change that this means to me and busy distracting myself, playing games (and eating - eating is a great distracter.... what did that just taste like?). Yet I see in the dream that the change is coming inevitably despite my 'freaking out'. And that when it comes it will grow quickly and in unexpected ways. And I am also my wiser self who is watching and attending and knows that everything is going to be okay. It is also interesting that someone else is giving birth. I have some ideas about what this means to be discussed later...